Monday, April 13, 2009

#43: Koston leaves Lakai

What is it about "nom nom nom nom" that is so appealing? I heard a little asian girl talking to her friend and out of nowhere "nom nom nom nom."

What?

I'm checking my facebook for red boxes (that's how I know I'm popular) and my white friends' status is "looking forward to blah blah butt fucking blah blah, nom nom nom."

What?

Are we all watching Sesame Street again?



Hm?



She's definitely not saying "nom nom nom" as she's throwing down 12 plates of curry rice (13.2lbs) in 20 minutes to win this eating comp.

Mothasuckin' Jeeves don't even know this answer, so what's your excuse?





Now,

in light of the blogs I've been reading as of late, I've noticed a familiar theme whether the blog be about fashion, music, or daily life. I'm reminded of a grade 10 English essay where every sentence is a fucking simile, metaphor, allegory or some sort of literary device that has been unwillingly lured by a grey haired man to a white van with candy (and I'm sorry for being a hypocrite). It wants to be there, but realizes it's not suppose to be there.

Watch how Lil' Wayne does it right on his ESPN blog:

First of all, I cannot even begin the blog today without stating a simple fact I have recently come to realize: Dwyane Wade, you are amazing. I was not a believer. You know I'm Kobe all the way to the grave. But to see what Dwyane Wade does on the basketball court, man. It's shocking on television, but in person it's unfathomable. Sitting down front row and watching that kid jump over everybody's head and be such a terrible jump shooter during the whole game but, as soon as it matters, everything he shoots goes in? That's amazing. I haven't seen him in the elevator lately, but when I do I'm going to tell him how amazing he is.

Listen, next time I see you in the elevator I want to be able to tell you how amazing you are, so write it right, and write it well (I'm sorry for this as well).

Now,

while writing this blog I needed pictures of asian girls, and when you're searching google images without that safe search on it can lead to some serious reprocussions (blood rushing to your phallus), and while I wanted to leave everyone a beautiful sight, (2 japanese girls playing time crisis) I just can't risk it.

And that's the truth.

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